My friend Rob Goldstein once told me he sees Second Life “as a tool for healing the soul and rejuvenating the imagination. Second Life is not a game. Second Life is a tool for creating a better reality. The trick is to stick with it, to be who you are becoming, even if you must do it by yourself.” I wonder, or more likely my mind wanders, but why do we fear being alone? Do we really believe that by finding an “other” we will be rescued from, something, but what? Ourselves? Is a solitary life less important, less appealing than a conjoined one? On a personal level, I’ve been alone for such a very long time, the silent spaces and pregnant pauses are as much a part of me as breathing air. I oft think it is perspective. Why must we think of being alone as loneliness? Can’t it just as well be called solitude? Solitude definitely has a more tranquil, joyful ring to it. No?
Sure, we all at one time or another dreamed of living the fairy tale of one day finding our Prince Charming, being swept off our feet and living the rest of our days leisurely with a hazy glowing aura of love about us. But the reality is we should love ourselves enough to design a life that’s so amazing you don’t WANT to be rescued from it. Ideas for an amazing life are all around us, it just takes a special mind to reach up and grab them. Shouldn’t we be fascinated with ourselves? You are an amazingly, unique individual, why can’t you celebrate who you are? Take a minute and forget about “what’s wrong” with you and put positive energy to focusing on all the wonderful qualities you possess. I know, easier said than done. But on the flip side, if we don’t love ourselves, nothing much really matters. No matter what we conquer, create or experience, we’ll never able to appreciate it or ourselves or be fulfilled in the process, because we will be constantly striving to be validated in an insatiable way. So don’t think of self-love as vanity, think of it as necessity, because it truly is one.
Take from? Yep. The next time you find yourself alone and think this would be perfect if you just had someone to share it with. Know inside that self-love is what you’re actually searching for, not someone to fill a void. Sadly, we spend most of our lives believing someone else can complete us or give us that which only we can give ourselves. To be truly fulfilled in life, we have to find that love within us and give it to ourselves. No other person, amount of money, material possession or accomplishment can do it. It’s up to us. We have an opportunity to celebrate who we are for any reason, at any time and we should. As for me, I’m so proud of myself I think I’ll go have ice cream for lunch to celebrate. I might even go for the waffle cone and the little sprinkly’s too, I’m feeling pretty magnificent with myself.