Tossing the Bucket

“I would not have traded two minutes of the joy and the grief with that man for two decades of anything with another.”
– Lou Gehrig’s wife, Eleanor

 

I wasn’t going to take this pic, but in the end I caved to pressure.

Picture Books

Jewelry: Chop Zuey, When Elephants Dream Set

Stephen Covey once said “Every human has four endowments – self-awareness, conscience, independent will and creative imagination. These give us the ultimate human freedom… The power to choose, to respond, to change.” At the turn of the 20th century there were a few million African elephants and 100,000 Asian elephants. According to the World Wildlife Federation (http://wwf.panda.org) Today, there are only 470,000 to 690,000 African elephants, and 25,600 to 32,750 Asian elephants. Think about that, in the entire world, their population is roughly equivalent to a medium sized city. So what, it’s just a dumb animal? Naw, I truly can’t believe even the most callous individual would say that.

Gizza: Dropped Collar jacket,leather miniskirt . Miamai: Georgia pumps

Did you know elephants, humans and Neanderthals are the only animals known to have death rituals? If an elephant becomes sick, its family shows compassion bringing it food and helping the creature as it tries to stand. In fact, this compassion and grieving doesn’t stop when the elephant dies, one of the most moving displays of an elephant’s emotions is how they remember and mourn loved ones. When an elephant walks past a place that a loved one died he or she will stop and take a silent pause that can last several minutes, possibly reliving memories of the family member.

Hat: Baoba.

These gentle giants, the largest land animal on Earth, have no shame in showing their joy either. They play games and greet family members and friends; they celebrate the arrival of newborns to their herd. In fact, not unlike humans, there is no greater love in an elephant society than the love of a mother for her child. The mother protects, guides, and nurtures her young, always close, always touching. She bathes her child by using her trunk to spray water on the little one and scrubbing it gently. In fact, the mother daughter bond often lasts more than fifty years.

Clutch: [G/C] Muriel *L’accessoires . Belt: Diram

Why all this? Why today? Like most things I blog these days, because I care. I was dropped a NC by another model who bought one because she cares; she left no IM, just a NC. But in the NC, Eliza Wierwight the designer of Patron had thoughtfully written out a plea for help because she cares too. For more on Eliza’s story link here: (http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500340@N06/11066955435/in/photostream/) Eliza asks such a small thing of us; buy one of her Christmas elephant topiary’s for 499L’s and 100% of the donations will go to Save Elephant Foundation. (http://www.saveelephant.org/), a non-profit organization created to save the Asian elephants from extinction. In Second Life, to make purchasing/donating easy and convenient, not only can you purchase the item’s at the Patron Main store, we have vendors set up throughout the Salimar Luxury District. This isn’t about Salimar, or about Patron, this is about life, about all creatures great and small, about our power to choose, to respond, to change. The question is, what do you choose to do? Are you willing enough to sit back and do nothing, so your grandchildren may never be able to see an elephant except in a picture book?

Take from? We all have the power within us to help others, whether its human or animal, all things deserve compassion. What better time to buy yourself a Christmas gift of an incredible decorative topiary with the added caveat the Linden’s are paid forward to help a majestic creature that needs our attention right now. They need our caring enough to do even the smallest of things. Just something to think about in this time of holiday spirit. We gladly welcome other designers willing to place these adorable Christmas topiary’s around their stores. If interested, please contact Eliza Wierwight and she will be happy to help you.

PATRON The Art & Design of Eliz, Patron (79, 235, 30)
SALIMAR Luxury District http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/SaliMar/95/127/502

★To sponsor an SEF Elephant costs USD$ 109.20.
★That’s approximately L$27,000 per elephant.
★That’s 54 donation/sales at L$499 each of the Save The Elephant at PATRON Holiday Topiary per elephant sponsorship.
★Now we multiply that by 35 Elephants which is the current sponsorship goal.
★We can do it !!!
★In fact I have already sponsored one elephants all by myself (Eliza Wierwight) (actually with my son because he’d be sad if he wasn’t involved)
★Buy one gift boxed “Save The Elephant at PATRON Holiday Topiary.” for yourself, buy lots and gift the ultimate legacy to a friend, make a donation, bit by bit we can do this over the next month.
★ Tell your friends, spread the word.

Autumn’s Decay

The Autumn~ Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Go, sit upon the lofty hill,
And turn your eyes around,
Where waving woods and waters wild
Do hymn an autumn sound.
The summer sun is faint on them —
The summer flowers depart —
Sit still — as all transform’d to stone,
Except your musing heart.

How there you sat in summer-time,
May yet be in your mind;
And how you heard the green woods sing
Beneath the freshening wind.
Though the same wind now blows around,
You would its blast recall;
For every breath that stirs the trees,
Doth cause a leaf to fall.

Oh! like that wind, is all the mirth
That flesh and dust impart:
We cannot bear its visitings,
When change is on the heart.
Gay words and jests may make us smile,
When Sorrow is asleep;
But other things must make us smile,
When Sorrow bids us weep!

The dearest hands that clasp our hands, —
Their presence may be o’er;
The dearest voice that meets our ear,
That tone may come no more!
Youth fades; and then, the joys of youth,
Which once refresh’d our mind,
Shall come — as, on those sighing woods,
The chilling autumn wind.

Hear not the wind — view not the woods;
Look out o’er vale and hill —
In spring, the sky encircled them —
The sky is round them still.
Come autumn’s scathe — come winter’s cold —
Come change — and human fate!
Whatever prospect Heaven doth bound,
Can ne’er be desolate.

Outfit:
Petals: Tableau Vivant, Breaking Apart
Hat: *Lode*, Bittersweet
Dress: Maitreya, Hera **Designers United**

Nothing is Impossible, the word itself says I’m Possible ~ Audrey Hepburn

Hairs: Vanity Hair, Fantastic Girl *NEW** .

It’s going to be a bit high-gravity today, I am still a little lethargic and grumpy after being sick. Is it okay to mention I am a bad patient? Frankly being sick ticks me off, but being sick for three weeks? That’s enough to make me neurotically insane. Well that’s my excuse anyway. My coworker? I don’t think she can find one. I take a highway to get to work as opposed to the Interstate because I prefer a drive with a view. At one point in my travels there is an Interstate off-ramp and the traffic merges on to the four-lane highway. My coworker exited the interstate and had to travel across the right lane to the left lane I was driving in because the right lane eventually veers onto another road. I guess she didn’t think I was slowing down to let her merge in (I was) because when she swerved over in front of me she began shaking her fists at me. To this I say (1) is it everyone on the roads job to make sure you get to drive everywhere you want, right when you want, without you ever having to apply those brakes and wait your turn? And (2) I wonder if you were embarrassed when I arrived at work right behind you and you saw it was a coworker you have worked with and joked with for 13 years that you were shaking your fists at? I kinda hope she was, I would have been, aggression in driving can lead to fatal decisions. But all this reminded me of something. Happiness. How can you be happy when you are acting like a maniac?

Outfit: *SoliDea FoliEs*, Miss Sapphire for BOSL Fashion Week . Hairs: Boudoir, Baroque . Pose:.slouch .

I’ve found that there are several keys to happiness and this Monday, this lethargic Monday with a cranky co-worker and a crankier Cao, I am going to save myself and focus more clearly on my happiness. I am going to accept what I have in life because happy people have modest levels of expectation and aspirations. In other words, they want what they can get, while unhappy people never seem to get what they want. I am going to live for today, for right now. The bummer of an incident from this morning? It’s done and over, it’s in the past. All those dreams I have for my future? Nope not going to worry with goals either because dime to donuts fate has other plans anyway. Besides, I am optimistic and feel I have free choice and complete control over the events in my life. I believe with all my heart that the future is 100% going to happen, how’s that for odds? I will choose how I deal with any situation and by being myself, by not trying to be someone else, staying busy and abstaining from throwing myself into one of those dreaded “us” and “them” categories, I expect to live a life filled with happiness. Why? When I am driving down the road and someone cuts me off I am going to slow down, be happy and forgive you because bottling emotions and bad feelings causes psychological distress and physical discomfort.

Outfit: *SoliDea FoliEs*, Tai for Avenue Fashion week. available SEP292013 . Pose: Manifeste .

Take from? Though I’m not sure I got here from there, but here is it. When you act badly, always be careful because you never know who might be watching. If you’re feeling aggressive, mentally slow down and try to find a happy place because no one needs that kind of anger roiling around in them. Mark Twain once said, “Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” Life’s short, why be angry? Slow down, be optimistic about life, look at all the good about you and just be happy, happy, happy.

You were born to be Real, not Perfect.

Hairs: Dura, Boy/Girl 46 **NEW** ❤ . Necklace: LaGyo, Itzel Statement **L'Accessoires** . Earrings: Azoury, Ebene **L'Accessoires** .

Check this out! L’Accessoires! One Year Anniversary, new round! ‘Nuff said. Hows that for “Word and Peace” Draakje Dailey? TAXI!! Taxi:

Outfit: Gizza, Hannah **NEW** Includes bracelet, necklace, a purse and sunglasses! I know! Crazy right? RUNNNNNNNNNNNNN before she changes her mind!

Duffle: Azoury, Duffle bag Polochon **L’Accessoires** . Clutch: C’est LaVie, Embroidery **L’Accessoires . INSET Earrings: Azoury, Ebene **L’Accessoires** .

Time Stands Still

I know, I blogged with hair for this first pic, the Ladies Who Lunch hat and the Donna Flora earrings were crying because they wanted to be teamed with this hair from Tram.

When someone we love dies, or leaves us, it seems as if time stands still. And silence, a quiet sadness, can often be felt so deeply it leaves a hollow and cold shell where once there was fire. It leaves a fierce longing for one more day… one more word… one more touch… We may not understand why they had to leave before we were ready to say goodbye, we will just know where there was light and joy there is now bleak reality.

Last night, when I was lying in my bed, composing words along the ceiling, trying to form coherent thoughts and feelings, I spent so much time just remembering. I always say my sister in law and best friend Kim died a few years ago, it seems like just yesterday, but last night I figured it out. Six years. It’s been six years since I saw all the bruises on her legs and told her to go to a doctor quickly. It’s been six years since she went to the doctor and never came home again. I should have known it’s been six years; her young tween children have since grown wings and are perched to fly. My brother has lost everything, his job, their home, his dignity and grace, but he too, now thankfully sober, has risen from the ashes with renewed hope. But me, I keep that year and wear it daily to remember. I want to always remember how when she suffered and fought with courageous hope and courage, I cowered in a corner, deeply saddened with my own loss. How in her final days, the leukemia winning the war, it was she who comforted me, not the other way around. How selfishly I worried about how I was being devastated by loss. But little by little, as time passed, I began to remember not just that she died, but she also had lived. And her life gave me memories too beautiful to forget. In the end, she taught me life’s greatest lesson, Kim reminded me how to live.

Take from? Well it’s all pretty much spilled out now. But I do wonder if I would have wasted another moment cleaning my condo before a party, when I could have spent the time laughing with you? Would I have let anything, even college, keep me from being covered in cake and ice cream on your birthday? Would I have chosen not to hold your hand in public? Kim lived for those she loved, and those she loved will always remember. This is why I choose to fight for those I love, to give even to those I don’t, because I want to leave only small footprints on this Earth but soft enduring light in the hearts of those about me.

Outfit:
Hat: LWL, March Hare Helmet
Earrings: Glam Affair, Flowery Earrings *Collabor88*
Dress: Milk Motion, Lace Dress *Collabor88*
Pants: :[P]: Cestus Pant

Earrings First picture: Donna Flora, Vivian Earring
Hair: Tram A816

Breaking.the.Shell.

“You need to grow out of your shell.” I hate that expression, it’s appalling. When I was in elementary school the teacher would always say, “she is so shy, she needs to grow out of her shell.” Not, “even though your daugher is in first grade she reads on a sixth grade reading level.” Somehow this shell that I thought made me sound pretty ugly and grotesque was more important than intelligence in a grown up worlds perspective. Somewhere in the beginning of the 1900’s (I blame Dale Carnegie) we changed from a Culture of Character (citizenship, duty, golden deeds, honor, reputation) to a Culture of Personality (magnetic, fascinating, dominant, forceful). So what? It’s created a large mass of population who will always feel inferior, either due to true shyness or even a genetic introversion. Introversion is hereditary and can’t be beaten or taught out of the child, it is an integral part of who they are. So regardless of the intelligence of the child, they are taught social behaviors to help them develop into something they aren’t, a forced extrovert. Which in turn secretly tells them they are inept, less able than their naturally extroverted contemporary. Our focus has become warped by this constant focus on personality over character, it has created an obsession with looks, and success and somehow denigrates true brilliance. No wonder we have become a nation who always feels anxious and tense. We are always fighting our very own nature because society tells us we must. In fact it was only recently when I began to read, “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking” by Susan Cain, that I realized I’m not defective, the world is. I used to believe I was shy. I’m not shy at all, I find it easy to speak with a passerby when I need help with something. I am a quiet thinker and listener, an introvert. I think a lot of the people I meet in SL and the real world probably are too. They just have been taught not to act it. It’s not us that needs to change its the view on this character trait that does.

I honestly could go on and on about this. I won’t though. So take from? Just know. I’m okay and you are okay too. Don’t ever feel you have some flaw if you prefer to write your feelings out, or prefer staying in with a book instead of going out to socialize at some mad party. It’s okay, it’s how you relax. Your probably an introvert like me. People are different and these differences mean absolutely nothing. Besides, some of the best things ever created were created by introverts. Without Sir Issac Newton, Albert Einstein, Theodor Geisel, Charles Schulz, Steven Spielberg, J.K.Rowling, all introverts, we would have no theory of gravity, theory of relativity, no Dr. Seuss, or Charlie Brown, none of the many and wonderful movies of Steven Spielberg, nor the Harry Potter series of books. I feel a little better about myself, a little more balanced, I hope you do too!

Outfit:
Dress: Countdown, Action! Pink *NEW*
Watch: GIZZA, Asia *NEW*
Jewelry: Kungler’s, Abaco *NEW* (to me at least)
POSE: Behaviour Body, Editorial poses *NEW*
Shoos: N-Core, zen

Dhá giorraíonn an mbóthar

Life’s funny. I’ve been so out of sorts all week and today is no exception. Workwise, its been a slammer. I hate it when my First Life gets in the way of my Second Life. Well to be honest, I am equal opportunity, I hate it when my Second Life gets in the way of my First Life too. Oh wait, and most of all I hate it when my work life gets in the way of my personal life! I think retirement is wasted on the elderly(sorry mom and dad). One of my mum’s most cherished memories of me is when my kindergarten teacher asked me to say what I wanted to be when I grew up to which I immediately replied, “I want to be retired.” Hey I always did like to dream big! But well, I didn’t marry it, or earn it, so here I am.

I am having a casual weekend, and I hope you all are too. Don’t forget tomorrow is the Tribute to Galliano Show, I can’t believe Fashion For Life is already winding down, last I heard, over four million has been raised. I hope you will help get the number over six million this year. This is a 100% charity, 100% of the money earned goes directly to the American Cancer Society’s Relay for Life program. So come, give and receive the gorgeous outfits from the participating inworld designers. And if you can, some see me walk the runway tomorrow. I wish I could show you my “Lolly” gown from *SoliDea FoliEs* it is amazing! I know a lot of fashionista’s out there who are going to swarm the vendor for it! As it is, I’ve had to carry it around for two solid weeks now and not show anyone! Let me tell you, that’s kind of tough for a lil Cao to do. We like to show off all the pretties! So please come tomorrow and see me! 10AM SLT! Here’s the LM to get you there, I’m kinda nice like that. Taxi:

Take from? Well of course there is! It wouldn’t be Cao’s blog with out one. Back to the title, “Dhá giorraíonn an mbóthar”, when the travel gets rocky and the traveller grows weary always remember its okay to ask for help, because “two shortens the road.” Today, in honor of my week from ‘ell, I’ve decided to sneak out of the office a little early to kick start my weekend. It is St Patricks Day weekend after all. So I leave you with, ‘Ballaí don ghaoth, agus díon don bháisteach, agus deochanna in aice na tine, gáire chun cheer leat, agus iad siúd grá agat in aice leat, agus go léir gur féidir le do chroí mhian! (May you have: Walls for the wind, and a roof for the rain, and drinks beside the fire, laughter to cheer you, and those you love near you, and all that your heart may desire!)

Outfit:

Hair: *booN, YNO421
Stole: *COCO*, Fur Tippet and Pearl
Jewelry: Mandala, Pearl Rain
Glasses: (Goucci), Neutral Oversized Sunglass Taxi:
Cocktail: (Goucci), Scarlet Silk Dress
Purse: [Belgravia], Totem Purse – Tango Crocodile
Gloves: Mimikri
Shoos: N-Core

I.Carry.Your.Heart.

Gizza, Ellendir gown

I learned something disarmingly sad about myself over the weekend and because I am human, and want to change myself for good, I choose to put my flaws up here for all the world to see. As you know last weekend I came down with the flu and was pretty much down for the count. Well this has continued all week and worsened again over the weekend. In my smallness, I felt sorry for myself this lingering illness, but then I spoke with two dear friends. One, who is one of the closest friends to me I have, told me she may not walk again for a while. Her MS has taken a turn for the worst. Another friend, a new friend, said today his Parkinsons is winning the battle with his body for the moment and he is in great pain. The thing is, neither was feeling sorry for themselves or whining, they were just telling me to slow down and wait for them while they regroup. I had to sit back, bring out my mirror and take a look at my ugly soul. I am so small and inadequate. When events befall us, it is so easy to feel a victim betrayed by life, but remember for most of us, we can be assured that “this too shall pass.” Take from, yes. Here it is, and it’s not even from me. “I cried because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet” Chinese Proverb.

Gizza, Goodbye Summer Gown

Everyone knows I have my big Italian gyspy family, they adopted me and I have never left their door step. I was always such a solitary traveler, but then they showered me with their endless love. But, at about the same time, I was also adopted by my big Turkish family. What can I say? I love being loved and loving others. Giz Seorn of Gizza, has always made sure she has room for me in her family, and for this I am endlessly thankful.

Gizza, Gloria

Recently while looking through my photo’s I had ear-marked for Trend magazine, I noticed one of the shoots Draakje and I had prepared for the summer “issue that never was,” there were some photo’s of items Asia Rae had taken of me wearing Gizza (the top two photo’s). The above photo is a recent release from Gizza and includes a HUD so you can actually change the colors of the dress! Remarkable! One dress, many colors! YAY! The models are left to right: Draakje, Falbala Fairey, Cao, and Ponchituti Boucher. (LOVE LOVE my Ponchi!). This dress is gorgeous and chic, so runnn! The scrumptious gown below is Gizza’s Valentine edition of the Gilda dress. Isn’t it divine? I can’t wait to rush over there and buy myself a little Valentine’s Prezzy. All photo’s are the work of Asia Rae (Love her too!) I hope to see you at Gizza’s, I’ve even included the taxi for you: Taxi:

Gizza, Gilda for Valentines